Gnocchi

JetStar: You can travel around Australia on Jetsaver Light tickets for about 35 US dollars a trip. You don't get to check in any luggage and it's $80 if you do. They do not feed you or give you water. Tent pegs cannot be carried onto the aircraft as they can be used as a weapon. They do not check ID, they barely even check tickets. Liquids of any size can be carried on.

Byron Bay

Cape Byron: Typical Australian beach town and home of Australia's most easterly point. There's a cool lighthouse, good food and really annoying Aussie teenagers.

The Arts Factory: Canadian chick at reception thinks she's cooler than she really is. I didn't know it was possible for someone to be nice and bitchy simultaneously. This place is hippee haven. Their cafe food is reasonably priced and kicks ass. The first 3 rows at the cinema are cow print lounge couches where you get to lie down with a teddy bear to watch the one movie they play once a night. The shuttle drops off in front of Noodle Box and picks up in front of the train tracks.

Gold Coast

Surfers Paradise: Looks just like mainstream America with too many chain restaurants and high-rise hotels. Everything closes at 5:30pm so if you plan on eating dinner, go early.

Aquarius: British chick at reception needs longer shirts. Can't understand a word she says. They advertise a $2 breakfast deal, but you have to tell them the night before so they can actually go and buy toast.

Dreamworld: Rollercoasters make me vomit.

White Water World: Best water park ever, but only because I was the only one there. There were more employees than there were park goers. Take the theme park express bus from Gold Coast to any of the 4 parks for only 6 Australian dollars. No need for a shuttle if you want to save a couple dollars.

Rainbow Beach

Debbie's place is a steal. Quality room for a good price, but you have to stay two consecutive nights or there's a 20 dollar cleaning fee. Debbie herself is a crazy lady who drives like a maniac. She will take you to the beach or drop you off at the sandblow, but be prepared to jump and roll because she will not stop the car. Fantastic stretch of beach with colorful sand, but watch out for the 4WD vehicles.

Fraser Island

Tours to Fraser Island leave from Rainbow Beach or Hervey Bay. The Eurong Beach Resort serves a lot of cold pasta and cold rosemary chicken. The rooms look like hospitals in third world countries. Watch out for dingos and even more 4WD Toyotas. Largest sand island in the world with a cool shipwreck that's a huge tourist attraction.

Noosa

Noosa is the La Jolla Village of Australia. Fancy restaurants, old rich couples in perfectly tailored white pants, and a Sheraton hotel. Turkey looking fowls run rampant and a river runs through it. If you are on a budget, but require to stay on Hastings St., see John and Mary at the Noosa Village Motel. Pumpkin gnocchi is delicious.